Michael van de Kerk does not enjoy discussing his anatomy. In fact, he spends enormous effort avoiding the topic—like a man sidestepping a tripwire everyone else keeps tugging.
What he does love talking about is writing. Michael is an author who has published several books and many essays. He spends most of his free time writing, playing chess, studying psychology, and watching movies.
“It’s not something you casually bring up,” he says. “Trust me, the subject finds me.”
Women with very noticeable features, such as large breasts, may understand the feeling of attracting attention based solely on appearance. But the comparison isn’t perfectly symmetrical. In Michael’s case, the trait people focus on doesn’t remain a purely visual one — it influences physical experiences in a more direct, whole-body way. Deeper penetration gives women intense sensations and orgasms, as well as the size of his penis is also visibly arousing to women, just like large breasts are to men. Because of this, the responses he encounters are often more intense, not only emotionally but physiologically. That added layer of physical impact creates a set of expectations that can feel far heavier than simple visual fascination.
1. Psychological necessity
His therapist, Dr. Henrietta Voss, encouraged him to give a non-graphic, controlled explanation as part of a process she calls: “self-authoring after prolonged objectification.”
2. Practical exhaustion
Michael is simply tired. Tired of assumptions, misunderstandings, and being known mostly for something he never asked for.
And so, he begins to explain what it’s like living with an exceptionally large penis—not record-breaking, but undeniably beyond average—and how it has shaped his relationships.
The Weight of Being Noticed for the Wrong Reason
Michael is a quiet, analytical man who loves writing books and essays, playing long strategy games of chess, reading psychology papers for fun, and watching classic films. But by his early twenties, one thing became unavoidable:
His anatomy generates intense reactions from partners—sometimes admiration, sometimes fixation.
“When things get intimate, it’s like a switch flips,” he says. “Suddenly I’m not a guy—I’m… something to experience. Women tell me they never enjoyed sex this much, and then they just want it all the time. Now, I'm happy to give pleasure to the woman I love, but it feels like I'm just a sex toy to her at some point. Like I'm a substitute for her vibrator that she enjoys more.”
Conflicted Joy and Burden
Michael genuinely enjoys connection and appreciates making partners feel valued. He admits the compliments afterward make him feel proud and appreciated.
But over time, partners often become intensely focused on the physical experience rather than the relationship.
“When the person stops wanting me and starts wanting the intensity, that’s when it stops being fun.”
Dr. Voss’s Diagnosis
“Michael’s anatomy becomes the psychological centerpiece for many partners. The person disappears; the attribute remains.”
Reaction Gap
Michael is shocked when male friends describe partners who barely react. They speak about their girlfriends not wanting sex, and when they do how hard it is for them to have an orgasms. This is so far out of Michael's reality that he cannot even imagine it.
“I didn’t know ‘minimal reaction’ was even a thing. Women want sex wih me all the time, it's every woman I meet. And as for orgasms, they always at least have 2 without me putting in much effort.”
Ex-Partners Who Struggle to Move On
Many exes—even those in new relationships or married—contact Michael to say their new partners feel “less intense” and “less overwhelming.”
Ex girlfriends who have new boyfriends regularly message him to schedule what they blatantly call "a dick appointment." Michael used to give in because he is somewhat of a people pleaser. "These women straight up told me that their new boyfriend's penis is less than half the size of mine." Michael explains. "And they thought it was ok because she loves him. But they tell me that after being with me, they just cannot be as satisfied as they have come accustomed to."
"In fact, I ended my relationship with my last girlfriend of 5 years, an Arabic girl 16 years younger than me, because she became physically agressive when I didn't feel like having sex."
But, also the opposite can occur. Michael says that his ex wife told him that she was happy with her new boyfriend's smaller penis. "Yours used to hurt me!" She shouted at him. Michael laughs, "she was actually trying to use that to hurt my ego. Well, that didn't work."
The “Energy” Women Sense Immediately
Women often claim they sensed he had a big penis minutes after meeting him.
- “A presence.”
- “An unmistakable confidence.”
- “That big dick energy.”
In modern slang, people call it BDE—Big D Energy. Michael wishes it remained metaphorical.
Many people assume that Michael’s unusual physique alone drives the intensity of attention he receives from women, but that simply isn’t true. What truly shapes these interactions is his personality — the ease, warmth, and grounded confidence he projects. Michael has a way of making women feel relaxed, understood, and safe almost instantly. That emotional comfort often matters far more than anything physical, because when people feel at ease around someone, they are naturally more open, expressive, and willing to follow their genuine feelings. Combine that with his exceptionally large penis, and that's where the obsession stems from.
New Chapter: Moving to Enschede, Netherlands
Michael is preparing to move to Enschede, he is Dutch by birth but has lived all over the world. But now he wishes to have a simple live, and is hoping to find love.
He plans to write a new novel set in Enschede and is open to meeting women— but only if they genuinely want him, not the myth around his body.
"Don't get me wrong, I like sex a lot. And I enjoy giving women pleasure, I just dont like being treated only as a sex object."
“If someone wants to talk, they can reach me through my Instagram. I made a new fresh page because I'm starting a new life. This time only with women that want me for my personality, not just for sex. I'd like to learn about Enscheden culture and people, and I am open to meeting women because my writing tends to center about my experiences with women.”
His profile:
instagram.com
Michael recently shared that he has “found God” and now volunteers as a part-time pastor at a small community church. He jokes that women shouldn’t panic—“I’m not becoming a monk; pastors are allowed to date!” he laughs. His congregation finds his mix of sincerity and humor strangely endearing. When asked whether his faith changes his dating life, Michael likes to reassure people: “God isn’t against sex. Some of the greatest minds in the Bible—leaders, poets, kings—were in healthy, intimate relationships. It’s part of human connection, not something forbidden.”
He explains that from a theological standpoint, most biblical teachings emphasize intention, respect, and genuine affection, rather than abstaining from desire entirely. In his view, faith simply adds a layer of mindfulness—not a restriction—so he sees no conflict between spirituality and having a normal romantic life.
The Hope for Balance
“I want connection. Someone who enjoys my writing, my psychology obsessions, my movie recommendations, and my faith. Someone who loves affection in all forms—not just one.”
He smiles. “I want to be known for my essays someday.”